essay代写学术文章若能间接引用与主题类似的观念或事物,便可使文章更简洁、减少字数,让读者更容易理解。下列句子并未在适当的地方善用暗喻,要如何使用暗喻,才能让句子更精简有力?
题目Contest Sentence:
“The people filed peacefully into the room and,one by one,seated themselves on the floor,each person assuming the fatalistic posture reminiscent of every non-violent protester who ever challenged authority.”
正确解答Answer:We believe the best revision is…“The people filed peacefully into the room and,one by one,seated themselves on the floor,each person assuming the fatalistic posture reminiscent of Mohandas Gandhi.”
我们相信最佳写法应为“The people filed peacefully into the room and,one by one,seated themselves on the floor,each person assuming the fatalistic posture reminiscent of Mohandas Gandhi.”
This sentence reduces the word count to 26 from 31 by letting one individual—Gandhi—personify a host of people.As a legendary champion of peaceful resistance and an advocate of human rights,Gandhi's influence extended worldwide in the middle of the 20th century.The name of this citizen of India became a shorthand reference to global acts of protest that were characterized by non-violence,civil disobedience,and peaceful resistance.
将人群比拟成甘地,字数顿时从31字减少到26字。甘地是印度人,因提倡和平抵抗与提倡人权而闻名,影响力早在二十世纪中已遍及全球。甘地的名字带给人们既定的印象,代表各种抗议活动如非暴力、不合作主义与和平抵抗等的象征。
There is nothing especially wrong with the wording of the original sentence,which refers generically to the world's history of non-violent resistance.It does so by invoking an image of peaceful demonstrators being civilly disobedient and submitting themselves to the reaction of authorities.This general allusion also enlarges the conversation by resorting to imagery.However,the image is not as sharp as a Gandhi reference,and sharpness and specificity nearly always spark understanding.
原句中提到非暴力抗争的历史陈述,提及和平示威者发起不合作运动、面对当局镇压等意象,措辞乍看之下并无不妥。这只是一般比喻,可将陈述转化为意象,但该意象却不如用甘地的比喻来的清晰,而清晰、明确有助于读者理解句子。
The reference to Gandhi is an arbitrary choice.Non-violent protest is a universal principle that has been expressed in the writings of nearly all major religions and philosophies,including Buddhism,Christianity and Taoism.An allusion to any advocate would have accomplished the same so long as the name of the selected person was familiar to the reader.The consequence of such an allusive reference is a shortened sentence,a sharpened image,and quickened understanding.
当然并非一定要使用甘地的名字,在各宗教与哲学典籍中,如佛教、基督教与道教等,几乎都看得到非暴力抵抗的宣言与坚持。只要所选的人名为读者所熟悉,任何拥护非暴力抵抗的人名都可以达到同样的效果。善用暗喻可以缩短句子,使意象清晰、促进理解。
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